Off to Camp

Currently sitting at the Portland (Oregon) ariport waiting for my first flight in my travels off to camp. I am nervous, excited, anxious, concerned, confused, optimistic, pessimistic and downright giddy! Yes! All at once.

I am really not sure what to expect. I mean I have the basics - cabins, kids, farmhouse, kids, lifeguard training, etc. But I have no details, no real concrete things to plan or anticipate. It is both exciting and nerve racking.

As I sit here I can't decide if I am more nervous about leaving and what that means, more nervous about being at a camp and what that means or more nervous about coming back and what that means. My logical side says to stop worrying and trust (know) it will all work out. I know that. I feel it and honestly, I haven't gotten this far in my crazy version of life without hard evidence that things (even the most messed up things) work out. However, with time on my hands it is hard not to have my mind wander. And though part of me wants to stop it part of me feels this may be the last time I have the opportunity to have my mind wander. Seriously, cause after today, my life may be total, controlled chaos!

I get in to Portland (Maine) tomorrow at 12pm. I will then have a 2 hour drive to the camp I will be working at in Freedom. I assume someone will meet me but it hasn't 100% been confirmed, but I'm trusting it. I have NO idea what Maine looks like, feels like or even smells like. I have been to New York City, Washington D.C., and North Carolina - that is my east coast knowledge, so I am coming at this entirely cold. Again both thrilling and terrifying. My understanding is that other couselors will be arriving tomorrow too. We will head to camp and have dinner together. Then break into our 'groups' to discuss training. Since I am running a community program with one other person we will meet then and discuss a few details of our program and also our upcoming lifeguard training. Starting Thursday morning I will begin lifeguard training. Apparently I will be swimming up to 500 meters a day and diving down to 12ft to retrieve a 10lbs weight. I haven't swam consistently in years but since I am a fish at heart I am not entirely worried. I hope my confidence isn't too far off base. The lifeguard training willbe intense and last about 4 days. Then I get the day off (June 15th). I guess we can do whatever we want but just have to be back for dinner that night, to meet all the other counselors who are arriving but not running programs or liefguarding. Then for the next 10 days (I think) we will have full-on counselor training. It is supposed to be educational, fun and full of team building. I imagine it is somewhat like what I did with kids clbu so I am looking forward to it. Then on August 27th the kids arrive. I have NO idea what exactly to expect from this point on... yet. I am not sure how many are doing my program or what type of kids they are. I am not sure of anything really other than living in a farmhouse, kind of away from the main camp, with the kids in my program. The rest I guess I'll figure out.

This is such a unique opportunity I can't even begin to quantify what will happen or what may happen. I truly feel like I am going in blind, but excited. I always say 'what I lack in real skill or knowledge I make up for in enthusiasm' so I am hopeful this attitude will get me through this and be better for it. I am sure this will be a once-in-a-lifetime experience. I am sure I will grow and learn as a person and future educator of children. But right now I am nervous and excited and keep thinking:

will they like me? will i make friends? will my friends here remember me? will i be missed? will my cat miss me? how will things be different when i get back? will things be different when i get back? what will the kids be like? will this be more like the classroom or the afterschool program? what do i do if i am bored? what do i do if i am lonely? will i get bored or lonely?

(deliberately written in lower case since all of these questions make me feel childish and silly for even asking or thinking... much less blogging)

And most importantly:

how can i possibly wait to see the new Harry Potter movie til August???!!! THAT is torture!

My goal is to blog as much as I can about my experience being a summer camp counselor (btw - I have NEVER gone to camp at all in my life as a counselor or camper). Hoppefully in doing so it will let me relate some silly stories and ease some of my (unfounded?) fears about life there and life back home.

For now I guess I should get ready to board and begin this interesting and totally unpredictable new adventure.

Til later,

Tiffy - camp counselor