Music and Dating

I often say there are certain songs that if I was putting together a match.com or eharmony account (no, I am not!) I would quote. They aren't necessarily an 'exact' description of what I want but close enough for government work. So in that vain I decided to post a few here (it may just be one for now but who knows?) I will use () to indact things that aren't entirely true...

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21 Things I Want in a Lover

Do you derive joy when someone else succeeds? (essential)
Do you not play dirty when engaged in competition? (unless for humor and not mean)
Do you have a big intellectual capacity but know
That it alone does not equate wisdom? (so important!)
Do you see everything as an illusion? (ummm... not needed really)
But enjoy it even though you are not of it? (again... not needed or fully understood)
Are you both masculine and feminine? (masculine is great! but crying is ok. um... don't borrow my clothes often - like my 'girl' clothes)
politically aware? (not super political, please no, but aware of the world around you and open to it is key)
And dont believe in capital punishment? (ummm... I sort of do so as long as you aren't militant either way)

These are 21 things that I want in a lover
Not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer (so true! no needed but sometimes preferred. or at least to be traded with other qualities)

Do you derive joy from diving in and seeing that
Loving someone can actually feel like freedom? (so true! not always diving in head-first but sometimes more than just toe-dipping)
are you funny? ala self-deprecating? (with me, you have to have a sense of humor. i do the stupidest things and if you can't laugh then it simply won't work)
like adventure? (we get one life - that we know of - LIVE IT! experience it all at least once, or twice)
and have many formed opinions? (i like this but please don't be so set in your ways that you are unable to have a calm or passionate discussion without fire and brimestone)

These are 21 things that I want in a lover
Not necessarily needs but qualities that I prefer
I figure I can describe it since I have a choice in the matter (we all have a choice)
These are 21 things I choose to choose in a lover

I'm in no hurry I could wait forever (if it's there it is worth the wait)
I'm in no rush cuz I like being solo (i LOVE my tiffy time. even together people need their own lives)
There are no worries and certainly no pressure (pressure-free is how it all should be)
in the meantime I'll live like there's no tomorrow (i try to live that way even when engaged in a relationship. carpe diem - reason it was my first tattoo!)

Are you uninhibited in bed? (necessary)
more than three times a week? Up for being experimental? (absolutely necessary. I could elaborate but I won't here)
are you athletic?
Are you thriving in a job that helps your brother? (doesn't need to be a job but should believe in helping people)
are you not addicted? (essential. liking a lot is great, encouraged even but going crazy without, yeah no)
...curious and communicative... (very necessary)
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I Want Love

I want love, but it's impossible (totally disagree btw)
A man like me, so irresponsible (woman and i am responsible just a bit free-spirited)
A man like me is dead in places (not really dead just bruised)
Other men feel liberated
I've had love, shot full of holes (true!)
Don't feel nothing, I just feel cold (really... who hasn't been there?!)
Don't feel nothing, just old scars
Toughening up around my heart (again, who hasn't?)

But I want love, just a different kind (yep)
I want love, won't break me down (yes please)
Won't brick me up, won't fence me in (yes please)
I want a love, that don't mean a thing (umm... not sure what he means here. i like things to mean things)
That's the love I want, I want love

I want love on my own terms (well and the other persons too)
After everything I've ever learned
Me, I carry too much baggage (i say it's about having matching luggage with someone. and all of mine fits into the overhead compartments nicely. would be nice to find that someone else's does too)
Oh man I've seen so much traffic (ummm... that sounds kind of slutty and i can't say that but i have had life lessons taught through experience)
So bring it on, I've been bruised (who hasn't?)
Don't give me love that's clean and smooth (relatively drama free though would be nice)
I'm ready for the rougher stuff (well... actually some less-rough would be nice)
No sweet romance, I've had enough (actually, i haven't had nearly my quota so i would say this line is not true. but realistic romance is key)
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So those are the songs that come to mind right off. They aren't exact and they aren't entirely accurate. And they aren't requirements or anything like that. But I think that it is important people know what they want. Helps with showing and explaining it to others.

I had said for a while these were songs I often thought of in this context so that is why I wrote this blog. Nothing more, nothing less. Just thought too maybe it would inspire others to use music to find themselves or their loves. But I also hope that people can fully realize how great it is to just be and just be on your own, without all the relationship stuff. I figure until you can be on your own and love yourself you can't love anyone else properly. I don't know if I'd say I love myself but I am slowing dating myself....